The Power of Reflections in Coaching

A client said this to me recently in our final coaching session:

“Your reflections allowed me to think about how I’m communicating. It allowed me to stop and think.”

In coaching, that can be it for that session. That’s the whole job. The secret sauce. And the reason why coaching works.

In most of our professional lives, there’s no margin for thought. Just go-go-go. Meetings. Deadlines. Slacks. Inbox. Panic. Repeat. We talk fast. We type faster. We answer before we understand. We default to what we’ve always done—even if it hasn’t worked in months.

But in coaching?
You get to pause.
You get to breathe.
You get to hear yourself.

And when you do? A surprising thing happens: You notice.

You notice how your tone changes when you’re under pressure.
You notice how often you hedge your language (“I’m not sure, but…”).
You notice that you’re writing six-paragraph emails when a three-line decision would do.
You notice the gap between what you mean and what you’re actually saying.

And noticing changes everything.

That client didn’t suddenly overhaul her leadership style. What she did was better.
She made a habit of stopping to think before she spoke.
And her communication got clearer.
Her team responded differently.
She felt less reactive, more rooted.

That shift? That’s leadership.

Coaching isn’t magic.
It’s not advice.
It’s not anyone telling you how to do your job.

It’s a space where you get to hear yourself without the background noise. Where you’re asked a challenging question at the right moment and suddenly everything becomes sharp. And then, when the next big meeting or tough conversation shows up—you show up differently.

You speak with intention.
You choose your words.
You sound like you meant to say what you just said.

Isn’t that the goal?

So if you’re reading this wondering whether coaching could make a difference for you or your team, start with this: When’s the last time you had space to think out loud, without interruption, advice, or performance pressure?

If your answer is “...never?”
Then coaching might be your next best move.

Because it’s not about fixing.
It’s about noticing.
And once you notice, you can’t un-see it.

That’s where the work begins.
That’s where it gets good.